The Commissary

The Commissary is John Tesar's place in One Arts Plaza. It's a burger/wine bar which kind of confuses me. When I want wine, I don't necessarily want burgers. And when I want burgers, I don't necessarily want wine. Am I alone in this loyal followers? But, heck, maybe John Tesar knows something I don't know.

First, let's get One Arts Plaza out of the way. I, for one, think it's a great location. It's close to both Downtown and Uptown, and I love sitting outside by the fountains (at least for now). Its biggest drawback is the parking. People in Dallas don't want to pay for parking. I know. I get it. But if you go to any major city in the world, you are going to have to pay for parking. And if Dallas wants to be a major city, we're just going to have to suck it up and accept the fact that paid parking is going to be a thing. But the good thing about One Arts Plaza is you don't have to pay for valet parking. Well, unless you valet park. And you shouldn't valet park ($8, really?) at One Arts. There is a perfectly good covered parking lot directly behind One Arts Plaza. It costs $5 (with no tip), you don't have to stand in the valet line (which can ridiculously long), and they take credit cards. It's a no brainer people, particularly if you are going to a show. Parking at One Arts is $5. Parking at Winspear is $15. Park at One Arts, have a pre-show dinner or drink, then walk or take the Art Cart the 1.5 blocks to Winspear. There is no reason why you shouldn't do this (well, unless there's tornadic activity and a torrential downpour in the forecast like there was last night and then that $15 for underground parking at Winspear is totally worth it. Guess where I was last night?)

Back to The Commissary. My first visit was, meh. The tartar tostada, which the server recommended, was delicious in some bites and inedibly salty in others. It was also just one tostada and kind of difficult to share. Tartar nachos would have probably been a better menu item (if not so salty).

I had apparently spent too much time at the Ballpark and, on my first visit, violated one of my basic restaurant rules. Don't order fish in a steakhouse. Don't order steak in a fish house. And don't order a hot dog at a burger bar. Well, okay, that last one's new, but it should be a rule. My first warning should have come when I ordered sauerkraut with my dog (which is made with Kobe beef) and the server looked at me like I was from Mars. Look, my last name starts with a Z, ends with a ski and has a million letters in between (most of them vowels). I am a "good" Polish girl who was practically weaned on sauerkraut. If you are going to offer it, I'm going to order it, and I'm going to expect it to be great and have a lot of it on my hot dog. I didn't get that at The Commissary. Instead my dog had a smattering of cheap, canned kraut on it. Yawn. And the bun was just too much. I ended up taking the dog (which was actually really good) out of the bun and ate it on it own.

But all of those issues were forgotten when the tots came. Tater tots made with freakin sweet potatoes. Imagine the best thing you ever ate at the State Fair. Now forget about that. John Tesar's sweet potato tots are better than the best fried food you have ever had at the State Fair. Bite-sized perfection. I just wish you could substitute sweet potato tots for the shoe string fries which are served with all of the burgers. Sadly the tots (and the onion rings which are just average) are an addition, not a substitution. But, John Tesar, I don't need shoe string fries and sweet potato tots. Seems kind of wasteful to me. Surely, there has to be a compromise.

On my next visit, I made it about the burger. I ordered the Rib Burger which is a braised short rib with collard greens and horseradish mayo on a brioche bun. Total yum. The bun was the perfect choice and the short rib could be cut with a fork. I don't want to know how much butter was used to make those collard greens but they weren't the least bit bitter. They were delicious, and I've never really met a collard green I particularly cared for (although collard greens played a key funny in the best Office episode ever - Diversity Day. Watch it. Hi-larious). And for $10 with fries? Totally worth the price.

M ordered the Magic Burger with aged cheddar, applewood smoked bacon, lettuce, tomato, red onions and pickles on an English muffin. They made it to her order (with a well done burger and bacon. Sigh, I'll forgive her because she's preggers. Burgers are meant to be eaten medium rare as far as I'm concerned.) and she enjoyed it. And for $7 (for the 6 oz burger/$9 for the 8 oz) with fries, total deal.

Not so impressive were the sides this visit. If you like Houston's/Hillston's shoe string fries, you'll like The Commissary's. The onion rings were really nothing special and M's "disco fries" (with cheese and something that can only be described as jalapeno dust) were forgetable (if you want great cheese fries with jalapenos, order them at The Old Monk. Soooo good.). Stick with the tots.

Not in the mood for burgers? There are not a whole lot of options for you (although there are a whole lot of "burger" options). Tesar does have his hand rolled penne pasta with black truffle essence. I'll admit, I haven't tried this dish at The Commissary, but I've had it twice before and it's amazeballs. Just ignore the butter hardening in your arteries. The bypass will be worth it.

Oh, and a note about the wine list. It's fun. It's off the beaten path. If you are looking for the typical California offerings you can find at World Market for $8 a bottle (or at Coal Vines for 3-5x that), you aren't going to find it here. It's not going to kill you to try an Austrian wine with your burger. You just might like it. Have fun and explore. That's what dining is all about. John Tesar gets that. Maybe he does know something afterall.

Cheers!